Dirt 

I’ve just finished reading a blog by kristinakumiz.com she told her story about a manager who took advantage of her thinking his power & status would be enough to over power her dignity. 

What got me angry, sad and boiled up was the comments after…..story after story of woman and children being abused and taken advantage of. People too embarrassed to speak out to their friends and family about it, people hurting and still dealing with these undeserved moments in time against them.

It’s unjustice. It’s not okay.
My father was a known pedifile and sexual predator. 

At nine years old he was in jail again, this time for raping and abducting two woman. They were prostutes. His comment was “How can you rape a prostitute?” 

At 14 years old I told my best friend about being abused by my Dad and another guy in my childhood. Do you know what my friend did…she believed me, she believed IN me, she told me to go get some help and to seek God for healing. This is a good friend. She said If I needed to talk I could anytime, if I didn’t want to then I didn’t have to.
The feelings I had as sexually abused person was this, dirt, shame, hurt. 

You feel like your covered in dirt and you can’t quite wash it off. Some days it was there stronger than others.

I struggled for years with these feelings of dirt and shame. And I often found myself acting out from them. But one day I felt real healing, God took all of my shame, dirt, and unworthyness and replaced it wholeness and love. Part of it came from giving forgiveness and the other came from realizing Gods unfailing love, seeing myself the way he really sees me and looking forward to a brighter and bigger future with Jesus in the center of it.

Blameless, beautiful, clean and pure.

Sometimes I felt like I was walking in dirty rags though no one could see, so this scripture is pretty awesome.

“Come now, let’s settle this,” says the LORD. “Though your sins are like scarlet, I will make them as white as snow. Though they are red like crimson, I will make them as white as wool.”‭‭ Isaiah‬ ‭1:18‬ ‭NLT

White as snow. Wow. 

So here’s what I say to anyone reading this. 

If someone has picked you to be the person that they trust enough to expose their heart to, please believe them and believe in them. Hold their hand, pray for them ….be there and encourage them to take action for real healing. It takes real courage to even come and speak about what has happened.

If you’ve been abused tell someone you trust, find someone to trust. Don’t feel ashamed, don’t feel guilty, Get help, seek life giving healing. And let Gods spirit do something amazing for you. Jesus can and will restore you more than what you ever thought possible and you will be more shiny and more radiant than ever before.

“and provide for those who grieve in Zion– to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor. ” Isaiah 61:3

God can make all things new, Crowned with beauty, full of joy, overflowing with life, strengthened in righteousness. 

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